We met with an oncologist this afternoon. We finally have a full pathology report on the type of tumor and the news is mixed. Hers is a cancer that is slow growing and it has some genetic mutations that make it much more responsive to chemotherapy. The big bad news is that it is not curable. The take home message we got today was that, unless there are some key medical advances in the near future, this will eventually take her life. Since it's a slow growing cancer, we have some time, we just don't know how much. The strategy is to monitor it until it gets too big or starts causing more symptoms and then decide which type of treatment between chemo, radiation, and surgery would best knock it back down a few sizes and hopefully buy us more time. Courtney really pressed him into giving her a timeline and he was artfully evasive. He stressed that 10 to 15 years ago he wouldn't have been able to give her much more time at all, but thanks to advancements, we can now significantly extend her life while new advancements are developed. Courtney wasn't satisfied with such a vague response and pressed him further. What she came away with is that with current treatments she'll be fortunate to extend for 10 years, and he hopes to eventually have the tools to give her 20.
There, I don't think I sugarcoated that, and I'm sorry if that was too heavy a load for some of you. Courtney says that if you're reading this, then you care about us and deserve to know the truth about what's going on.
Right now, the oncologist wants to "let the dust settle" from the surgery and see how much Courtney can recover from surgery. With that we'll have a better ability to determine if the tumor starts to impair function in the future. With the success of the surgery he doesn't feel a need to start any other treatment right now. This means that for the near future we'll be continuing to help Courtney recover (which is going to be a battle in and of itself) and she'll get an MRI every few months. We were told that she will have chemo someday, but the current chemo is one that isn't as traumatic to the whole body as some are.
This isn't as good as the news we were hoping to hear, and we've shed plenty of tears this evening as we've realized that our long term hopes and dreams have a very good chance of not being fulfilled the way we want. We have also already realized that the way we live needs to change right now so that we make more of each day and try to experience some of our dreams right now. We are deeply in love. We love each of you, and we find comfort in the love you share with us. Thanks for being there.
43 comments:
I got it to work! Now I can tell you here that I'm thinking about you both and praying for your family. I sent you PMs on Facebook.
I sound so trite, but you both amaze me and I'm grateful that you share so much of yourselves and your lives with us.
Love you both!
Love you both and you are constantly in my thoughts and prayers.
((((HUGS))) Your family will be in our prayers.
Thanks for the update, i can't imagine that was easy to write. my thoughts are with you and your family during these times, i hope you all have a wonderful holiday.
much love,
fish donald bandy
Again I am on my knees lifting you up with confidence that God can and will perform a miracle of healing. I will continue to pray with faith that each moment is full and cherished and that the moments keep coming! I love you all so much!
Lindsay
My prayers on your family's behalf will never cease. May you be surrounded with angels on both sides of the veil.
All my love.
You realize this is all your fault for being so happy and cheerful and pleasant to be around. Heaven wants you on that side. Well, we're not done with Courtney yet and they can't have her! If enough of us petition, they may let it slide. Hope my comment isn't offensive. It just expresses what I feel about you two. -BrianK
Wow. I don't really know what to say, except that I love you both and you will continue to be in my thoughts and prayers. For Christmas, I'm sending you each a big hug.
Prayers and our love to you all. I just wish I lived closer so that I could help out in some way. Praying for miracles.
Oh man...............This is not too much for all of us to bear, likely more for you guys. Share the load and we'll all send prayers your way. Sigh.
Marni and crew
Courtney and Jason, Thank you for sharing this news. I know there are some people who only want to hear cheerful bright reports or uber positive psuedo realities, but hearing things as they really are sometimes helps us realize that we are entitled to feel what is real and also have empathy for those who suffer for which there may be no phyisical balm to fix. I guess this is why we focus so much on the spiritual, because it is more of who we really are than just our phyiscal. So I share your hope for medical innovation and treatments that may extend Courtney's life or possibly a cure, but I also know that you each have the capacity and the faith to bear what ever comes from this. Our family will absolutely be mindful of you in our prayers.
We love you! Todd McDonald
Our hearts hurt after this latest update. We love you both and we're hoping and praying for the best.
Rex and Kate
We will pray for your strength and understanding! Life is never what we expect, we just try to keep working toward those goals!
Thank goodness you have such a loving and beautiful family! (Of course I'm including us in that statement!) ;-) Hope we can get our Christmas Cards out soon to you and the Spencer clan!
It may not have been the news we were hoping for, but it still has its positives. My prayers and thoughts continue to be with you and if you want to travel, New England is happy to have you here! ;) I wish there was more I could do for you and your family. From the moment I met you, Courtney, you have always been such a bright light! I know it will continue to shine! Lots of love!
Thank you for the continual updates. I can't even imagine what you and your family are going through. Know that you have many many friends who love you and pray for you daily. May you feel peace, even in this difficult time. We love you!!!
i am so sorry that this is the news you are faced with. i can't imagine the anguish you are all feeling. it breaks my heart. but i know you can have peace and comfort through whatever happens and enjoy all of your remaining time together. you never know what can happen with medicine, and miracles can surely come to pass.
you have been and will truly continue to be in our thoughts and prayers.
accept the bad, focus on the good, and bask in your love.
Courtney - You're still my hero! I don't think statistics will impede the power of God - or of prayer. Good for you two for starting to live your lives the way we all should be doing RIGHT NOW! (You are, and always have been, a miracle. I don't expect that to change.)
Bryce
Courtney and Jason,
We are saddened by this latest news. I know the Lord can carry some of the heavy burdens that you are feeling and I hope you will let all of us help as well.
You are in our thoughts and prayers. We love you and draw strength from your endless faith during this difficult time. What and amazing love you share for one another.
Thank you for being straightforward.
I agree with Bryce- miracles are possible and statistics are just statistics. And I believe that God is in control, regardless of how unfathomable it may seem to us down here.
But regardless of what happens, know that we love you and appreciate your example of courage and good cheer in such difficult circumstances!!
can't stop thinking about you, courtney. like jason said, that's heavy news to digest. my heart goes out of you guys. i appreciate you sharing your experience with all of us. thanks to you i'm praying harder than i've prayed in years and hugging my family tighter tonight.
Jason, Courtney, and Family,
I just want to let you know that Leila and I wish you strength, happiness and a wonderful holiday season.
Your strength and self reevaluations are an inspiration to us and we respect you greatly for your courage and acumen in such difficult times.
You are always in our thoughts and prayers,
Thomas and Leila
Doctors are people that try to know everything ,but we know that most the time are wrong,you are both really strong,and you can make to more than 10.You 'll be suprise what the power of healing can do....you are both really positive people ,just focus on what is important ...you will have miracle in your life...you have each other and his a miracle,you have 4 kids there also a miracle.Chin up..you can do it....never doubt you ability to go forward...you made it so far...keep on smiling
you are in my prayer,havenly father in next to you,never douth that.....
Ale
Sending all our love and prayers...!
Praying for Gods sweetest Blessings to be with you - His Hope, His Mercy, His Wisdom, His Songs & Music, His Confidence, His Patience, His Healing, His Love, His Insight, His Steadfastness, His Miracles, His Kindness, His Faithfulness, His Angels to bear you up and lighten your load, His Peace.
You're loved, Kathy Wright
Dear Jason and Courtney,we are friends of mum and dads from Bundaberg Queensland. we have been following your journey and along with all our other friends here, praying for a good outcome. We are saddened to hear your new but where there is life there is hope.We will keep you both continually in our prayers and thoughts. kindest regards Jan and Barry Jordan
Hey Jason, I know this is something that you weren't thinking about during dental school but I can probably tell you better than anyone that you have a knack for keeping a wonderfully positive attitude. Probably more importantly you have a way of lifting the emotions of people around you. As I'm sure that you are aware of, you can't control most of what surrounds you. But you can control how you react. I can't think of a better person courtney could have by her side. Keep up that determination and your family is in our prayers! Love, Ian Erickson
I'm thinking about you guys. I admire the strength and positive attitude you both have. I can't think of better people to have a miraculous outcome to this situation. I'm praying for your family.
Courtney, even in your trials, you continue to inspire me. Thanks for the reminder to live every moment to its fullest. I have seen miraculous healing firsthand, and I know that whatever happens, you are one of Heavenly Father's choicest daughters and He will encircle you in the arms of His love. We'll keep praying for you and your family
Courtney and Jason, this is Skye's siter-in-law Diane. I want you to know that I am humbled by your grace in accepting this trial in your lives. The direction the Lord would have our lives take is sometimes hard to understand but I know he takes into account the righteous desires of our hearts. I hope you have all the strength and time you need to have joy and peace in your lives. We love you and are praying for you.
It has been so long since I've talked to you. Your family has grown so much. I'm so glad you have this blog and I'm able to see pictures of you and your kids and hear all about what is going on. I'm a strong believer in miracles and I'll pray for many miracles for you future. You have always been such a great friend. I have so many wonderful childhood memories of the things we did together.
Lots of Love
Tami
Thanks for sharing this. It reminds me to make sure and use my time with my family wisely, not knowing what is in the future for any of us. I am sorry you have this hard thing to deal with. You are still in my prayers and I hope there are really good medical advances really soon!
We love you and are praying for you.
A world without miracles would be too hard a place; I believe in them. And I believe that faith and courage and trust in the Lord can bring those miracle into our lives. I send you and Jason lots of love and prayers for those miracles to touch you.
I am devastated. I really thought we were about to hear some much better news and I am so sad to hear this. My first response is that we are all going to pull together and FAST and PRAY, and go to the TEMPLE and PRAY and FAST some more and then one day you'll go to the doctor and they'll all be astonished to find not a speck of tumor or cancer left (which is possible). Then the spirit quietly whispers that I cannot force the hand of the Lord no matter how badly I want something. He knows best. The best thing we can all do in our lives is align ourselves with His will and then we'll find peace in this life. I am glad that you are making a change and living life more fully. Let me help in any way I can. (Do your dreams include a trip to Philly? We'll show you a really good time if it does!) Please know that I pray for you often and think of you more. I still (after all of these years) miss our stolen conversations during what was suppose to be voice lessons and I'm so grateful for the friendship you offered me. I love you!!!
(sorry this comment is long but writing helps me work out my feelings and apparently that's what I was doing here)
Oh you guys! Why does the Lord let this happen to people like you guys--you were so near perfect! :) You guys are such shining examples to the rest of us! Thank you for the updates--we will continue to "be" with you during this challenge. May the Lord's will be done in all of this. Love to all!!
Glad you're sharing this news because we're all here for and your family. You have always lifted us up with your love and infectious personalities, and so we can now try and do the same! Can give you the love freely but not sure about our personalities!!!
Love the B's
Dear Courtney and Jason,
This news is truly heavy to digest and I am deeply saddened. But, I have faith in the power of the Atonement and in the reality of miracles. We will continue to pray and fast for you and your family. May God bless all of you.
with love, Rachelle
Courtney and Jason: Your eloquence in describing the current situation is only exceeded by your grace in how you're attacking this challenge.
Allison and I and our sons will be praying for you and will be encouraging others you don't know to do the same.
There are still YEARS and YEARS and hopefully MORE YEARS of good news and love and laughs in store for your family. Enjoy!!
Rob
This is Nathanael Davenport here... I was once a roommate of Forrest's and visited y'all back in 2004 at Tom and Kaaren's, along with some of his other friends. (I was the tall guy who played the bass.) I specifically remember the two of you and seeing, even as a stranger, how much in love you were. I've been catching up on things tonight and am deeply impressed with the things you have written. I am more or less speechless... but I do want to share with you, for what it's worth, my conviction that I know that the Lord is watching over you both and your family, that someday all of this will pass, and the Lord will compensate you 100 fold for it all, just as Elder Wirthlin promised. I suppose I'm preaching to the choir; but I know in my own, comparatively small trials, I have seen these promises fulfilled. Thank you for sharing this experience for all to read. And of course, you - Courtney, Jason, kids, all Pixtons and Atacks - are in my prayers. I know that they'll make a difference. God bless you.
Prayers going out to AMAZING medical advances, courage, and peace for your family. That's difficult news to take and it's not even mine. Thanks for being so strait forward. My heart goes out to your family at this time.
Thank you both for keeping us updated, especially when the updates are not easily written. We too believe miracles are possible. Thank you for the gentle reminder that all of us should live our lives more in the moment and appreciate all God has given us, daily.
Our thoughts are with you and your family and will continue to ask God to shower you both with blessings!
Love,
The Harris Family
Keeping you in our thoughts and prayers. I am amazed and uplifted by your strength and faith as you face this trial. Hoping you have a wonderful Christmas this year with all those you love surrounding you.
Keeping you in our thoughts and prayers. I am amazed and uplifted by your strength and faith as you face this trial. Hoping you have a wonderful Christmas this year with all those you love surrounding you.
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